【Boobwatch 1 (1996)】

I am truly,Boobwatch 1 (1996) deeply, unfathomably terrible at Mortal Kombat 11— but damn if I don't like shouting "FATALITY!" at the top of my lungs.

When I received a copy of MK11, I had every intention of respecting it with a full review. The latest installment in a 27-year-long franchise with a history and lore more complicated than the Rosetta Stone, this game is the kind that deserves to be played thoroughly and written about thoughtfully. (Not to mention, early buzz had been very promising and from what few promotional materials I'd seen, the game looked veryworth my time.)

Unfortunately, as I've said, I suck at MK11 — so much so that after some surprisingly rough rounds in the tutorial setup, I deemed a traditional MK11playthrough out of the question. Foregoing the traditional storyline, I decided to just mess around, and subsequently had a freakin' blast.

Yes, I was reveling in the game's most surface-level enjoyments, and missing out on its reportedly incredible story. I've also heard the game mechanics are a vast improvement on past iterations, but considering I've never tried any of those past iterations, I'm missing out there, too.

But, I didn't really care.

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Maybe I'll try my hand at the main story again when I've got more time and can better tell my right from left (don't judge me), but for now I'm just enjoying the weird and wonderful ways I've decided to tackle the game.

So, if you're similarly terrible at kombat and looking for ways to enjoy this stunning, gnarly, and surprisingly hilarious game, grab a partner, hit Fight, and buckle up.

Here are 5 ways to enjoy the absolute hell out of Mortal Kombat 11, even when you miserably suck atMortal Kombat 11.

1. Google fatality codes like your life depends on it

An astute observation from yours truly: "I like it when their heads go smoosh."

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Mortal Kombatis a notoriously graphic series, and as best I can tell, MK11is no exception. From firey dragons splitting your torso in half to a dude slicing off your head, punting it like a soccer ball, and then impaling it with a spear midair, the game's finishing moves or "fatalities" are gloriously gory — and more than worth hunting down one-by-one.

To get to the fatalities, you've got to hit exactly the right combination of buttons right when your opponent is barely hanging on with the right character and from the right range. Otherwise, you'll get a lame finishing punch, low kick, etc. barely worth winning the match for.

So, you can aimlessly smash your controller and hope things work out — or you can Google the codes! Try these, for starters.

2. Play a terrifying round of body part H-O-R-S-E (Er, K-O-R-S-E?)

Why not make getting maimed and murdered fun for everyone?

Here are the rules for body part H-O-R-S-E:

(1) Say the body part of your opponent that your are intending to damage out loud. Example: "I'm gonna rip your jaw off."(2) Attack your opponent. If you successfully get the body part you named on the first try, then you don't get a letter. Alternatively, if you don't get the body part you named, then you do get a letter. (3) Your opponent must then attempt to get that same body part on you. If they successfully get it, then they don't get a letter. If they don't, then they get a letter. (4) First one to spell out "HORSE" loses.(5) No blocking or running away. (6) No repeating body parts. (7) Switch up characters frequently for added hilarity and hopelessness. (When you're bad at MK, doing anything intentionally can feel borderline impossible, but the unintentional is still pretty funny.)

3. Create elaborate back stories for your meat puppets

Yes, I understand that NetherRealm hired two incredibly talented and award-winning professional video game writers to create a masterful cast of compelling characters, impactful intertwining narratives, and an experience worth $59.99.

But in my playthrough, Baraka is my pre-pubescent son, whom I am gently guiding through the painful perils of toxic masculinity, normalized violence, and complex dental care in a cruel and uncaring world.

If, like me, you and your friends have no idea what's going on in the Mortal Kombat realm, then I highly recommend taking insane guesses, or just making stuff up. Sure, it sounds like an assignment for an amateur improv group — but it's also so freaking fun.

4. Blindfold the other player, try your best to beat them, and see who wins

At a certain point, it's easy to wonder whether a monkey smashing away at your controller would be better at Mortal Kombatthan you are. One could hypothetically answer that question by either (a) getting a monkey, or (b) trying this less involved option.

Is it an opportunity to test the limits of chance in a controlled environment or an excuse to leave the room while the blindfolded person keeps playing and you raid their fridge? No one knows!

Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable

5. Responsibly douse your MK11 playing experience in booze, snacks, and shouting

Mortal Kombatis a greatway to spend a night with friends all on its own, but for anyone (read: adults over the age of 21) looking to up the ante, it can't hurt to mix some alcohol in with your evening of mindless violence and intense competition.

I'll allow you and your tolerance level to determine the best way to implement this, but here is a list of cocktails that begin with the letter "K" for your convenience.

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